I didn’t know that I would miss you so much when you left me alone on the side of the road, to gaze confused into a dusty horizon.
I can only think of your eyes behind dark glasses, chiding me for my bravery, or lack of it.
Sad that my courage carried me from your car, from your dangerous embrace.

I’m sad too, left without the knowledge of what would have been,
had my self-preservation not won out over my desire to know what you are capable of.
What I’m capable of allowing to happen.

There was a time when we would have been perfect together.
I’d like to say it hasn’t come yet, but we both know it’s long past.
I’m too jaded and you’re not as cruel as you were in your youth.
My innocence and your callousness might have created a monster of such horrific beauty, those who came after would shudder and thank their lucky stars.
It could have been them, after all.
Wrong place, wrong time..
how wrong they are.

It could never have been them.
It could only have been us.
Except that I was never that naive and you were never that hard.

It’s better this way,
the way of not knowing.
Left to myself,
to wander the highway
In constant expectation,
Half hope, half fear
Every car that’s climbed into a reminder
That it isn’t yours.

There is no danger here
Because you aren’t here.

And I’m left a ghost, haunting a place where she was never killed
I’d never felt so close before.
Red covered bridges might not take you where you think.
I miss you more than I expected to.