There are days when I want to sell or give away everything I own.
I think about Maude,
showing Harold all the things she’d collected over the years
“It’s incidental, not integral”
and really, it is.

What is stuff but a way to tether us to space or time?
I can pick up a thing and know where and when it appeared in my life.
Before that it was formless, voidless, and someday it will be that again
I will be that again.
There is a quote from someone that I’d love to cite,
“I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”
and it might be Mark Twain
but I don’t trust the internet for accuracy anymore
There’s just too much of it to be sure.
Much like my stuff.
I don’t have a lot of stuff, but I probably have too much.

There is something to be said for simplicity,
for having everything you want be everything you have,
and never more.
I know someone like that.
I ask him, “What do you want?”
And he says, “I have everything I want.”

I’m not sure if he says that because he finds the wanting of things to be unhealthy,
or because it’s true.
I’m pretty sure thinking the former might be true
is due to a certain amount of envy.

There is a certain accuracy that is embodied by simplicity,
It’s very easy to count to one.
Chances are you always know where it is,
If there is only one thing to look for.

I live in a nice apartment.
Sometimes I spend time looking for a different apartment.
Or a house.
Or a farm.
Or a cabin on a lake somewhere.
Or perhaps the ocean.
Or maybe a treehouse.

There is always something else I want.
Even though what I have is very nice.
And there is nothing wrong with new beginnings,
new ideas,
new adventures.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to improve,
to grow,
to level up.

I think the issue I might have is am I levelling up in celebration of where I’ve been?
Or am I trying to distance myself from where I am?


Today’s deck is Moonlight Tarot