This desire to shine bright,
to gleam,
to be as at home within the firmament
as with my feet on solid ground
requires a balance between
acceptance of self
and connection to the grand scheme.

The sort of isolation that comes of a poverty mindset
This notion that if I can’t on my own then I shouldn’t
This idea that asking for help makes me burdensome
This belief system that community is for people who easily belong
Leaves me in the cold,
leaves me feeling as though I might need to rethink my strategy.

Encapsulating the all
means leaving room for the important things
like knowing when a nap
is necessary.



Today’s deck was not in the original lineup but I really wanted it there because cats. It is rife with whimsy and a lot of fun. The suits are ascribed to the elements which might be confusing for new readers, but the cats kind of make up for that. It was created by Lunaea Weatherstone with art by Mickie Mueller.

Stars are really interesting to me because they have this quality of being comprised of elements and explosions in my mind, but then they’ve also been anthropomorphized with names that are familiar and so they occupy both story and science, both outer and inner, lots of dichotomies. The Star card feels like permission to shine in a way that suits the self best. There are all different types of stars ranging in all the varied colours, they move and shift, they are long dead in some instances but still bright in the present. A good lesson.

The five of pentacles is a card of poverty, but not necessarily monetary, even though it’s the suit of diamonds/coins/discs etc. It can be loss of money, loss of stature but usually when it shows up for me it’s more about the poorhouse I’ve locked my mindset into. I’m trapped by circumstances where I feel I don’t belong at the table, a sort of imposter syndrome perspective. But it’s only a five, so there is hope to turn it around.

And the four of swords is just about rest. It’s about taking the time to heal the wounds of past, to settle the self before engaging with the potential battles ahead. Recuperating, recharging, listening to what the body and the mind need in order to be at their sharpest. Which might be incredibly challenging for some. Rest is a necessary part of the schedule, to be slotted in, not squeezed.